Day 43 – Poverty is Real, Part 3

When and as I see myself caring only about myself and not taking in account the lives of others, I stop and I breathe. I realise by not taking into account other people and their lives are a point of self-interest a point where I only care about myself and what happens to me, and not them aswell, basically not standing as one and equal, nor standing for all life but only myself.

When and as I see myself forming an idea of people that I have not yet even met before, I stop and breathe, I realise that these thoughts of the people that I have and that I am creating about them are presumptions and this is not for who they really are, but instead that is how I treat these people then.

When and as I see myself as better or superior toward a person with no money/status, I stop and I breathe, I realise that I am this person’s equal, and so are they my equal, an none of us are superior/better than the other - for us all are one and equal.

When and as I see myself living in separation with other people just because they are poor, dangerous or have no education, I stop and I breathe, I realise that I am part of the people of this world, and so am I not separated by this, for us must move as one body together, because a body with only 50% working will not be effective/productive.

When and as I see myself dealing with poor people, and feel that I do not belong here helping them, I stop and I breathe, I realise by reacting up on this feeling will bring us no good, and that I am not being self-directive, but instead being directed with feelings/emotions.

When and as I see myself wishing that I am not there with the people, but behind a screen where I have no problems, I stop and I breathe, I realise that I am giving my energy away on an useless activity: hiding. By giving my energy away to this activity shows that I am not willing to face reality for what it is, and thus trying to escape, instead of standing up for myself, for life, and for all, to help and contribute my part in life, unconditionally.

When and as I see myself fearing that I might end up as poor as these people I stop and I breathe. I realise that this is a fear of the future, and this fear is created by me, for the future, meaning it is actually not real and that I am fearing life.

When and as I see myself clashing/colliding with my imagination/mind about what I am seeing in front of me with my physical eyes, I stop and I breathe, through this breath I realise that what I am seeing is real, and there is no need to deny this because what my eyes observe is fact, is reality, and there is no escape to it.

I commit and allow myself to face reality for what it is, and not try and to avoid it by hiding behind a computer, or in my comfort zone where I do not have to experience it.

I commit and allow myself to stand as one and as equal with each and every human being I encounter within each moment, no matter the age, sex, "race" or status they have.

I commit and allow myself to stand for live, to be here in every moment, to live life to my fullest potential, and to do what is best for all life, unconditionally.

 Get a move on, for more info on memories and thoughts, visit: http://lite.desteniiprocess.com

Day 42 – Poverty is Real, Part 2

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have lived my life in ignorance not taking in account other people and their situation, just so that I can live my life to be successful without caring, and being unconditional.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form an idea about people that I have never even met before, ripping me from my ability to be able to stand as one and as equal with them, to be able to handle them as if they were my friend, and not some bad person that’s only capable of destruction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as better and superior toward poor people just because I have more money, and a bigger house than they have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from these people just because of this idea that I have of them that they are “bad” or “dangerous” people.

I forgive myself that I ahve accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is normal for some people to have it all, and some to have nothing at all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience separation while driving in these poor neighbourhoods, to feel that I am not a part of these people, and that I do not belong here, and that I don’t have to be here to witness it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish that I was not in that area in that moment, because I wish that I did not see these people and the real situation that they are in, because it creates a negative reaction within me, a fear that I might be one of them one day, that I might end up like them one day.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I am in a collision with reality, by not wanting to accept this reality for what it is, and to feel that I want to get out of there because this is too much to see/handle for me at this moment, to see so many, thousands of people suffering every day just because of this inequality within our world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to avoid reality, and wanting to do so by going home and hide behind the computer, where everything is fine, no problems, no people suffering and no people begging for money/food but only me and my “safety zone”, escaping reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry for these people, and by this feeling being directed to want to go out of this place, instead of staying and helping, not by giving food/money but giving them a chance to educate themself to be able to work themself out of this situation. (By giving the people money/food will only encourage them to keep on doing nothing but beg, give them a permanent solution, not a temporary one.)

 Get a move on, for more info on memories and thoughts, visit: http://lite.desteniiprocess.com

Day 41 – Poverty is Real

My whole life I have been living in middle to upper class areas, from pre-school up to high school and college, I have worked in an upper class area known as Rivonia, Sandton, probably the richest part of South-Africa. I have never really seen poverty, maybe a small town or two outside of where I lived, with poor people living in shacks struggling, but it did not really bother me. It felt kind of normal, because everybody can’t be rich, who’s going to be the person cleaning my house, standing at till points swiping my items through the scanner when I buy it, or fuel up my car at a petrol station, right? They have to live somewhere, and in my mind, that was their area, seem normal for me.

I never in my live had the chance to go into one of these areas, always been told that it is dangerous, and we should not try to enter it, they will steel everything from you, and maybe kidnap you, or murder you etc. So here was this idea within my mind about these people, the people living in poverty, the people we allow inside our homes to clean it, or to take care of our gardens. The people who struggle to survive. The people I don’t want to help because of this idea.

So, the idea of helping them never came up in my mind, and so it did not really bother me. It’s not me who’s trapped in that situation/poverty, I was not the one to be born into that world, I am here and this is my life which I have to make a success of, as should they with their lives... as a gardener, sure.

Until about 2-3 months ago, when I arrived in PMB, away from Gauteng which is known as the heart of our economy/country, where here in PMB all you can see is poverty, almost all that you see are shacks and little houses filled with massive families, struggling to survive, which still didn’t bother me as much because I thought of it as the same concept, until about 2 days ago, when I started to explore more in depth of what is going on, and see how they really lived.

This was not planned, it just kind of happened with my new business partners, we had to infiltrate new schools to sell our software to, and the more we explored into this territory, the more I realised that it had no end. These neighbourhoods are unbelievably big, the amounts of people are uncountable, schools are stacked with learners, and buildings are falling and breaking apart. The toilets in these schools look like shit, no other words to explain, and for a school of about 400 kids, there is only one male and one female bathroom, to be shared among them all.

These people live in real poverty; they go to school for free, where the school has to provide the kids with lunch because the parents can’t afford to give them food/money. Some of these schools can’t even provide this lunch, meaning about 400 kids or more starve every day just to attend school, and this is only in one school (a small schools). There are about 4-6 school in this area alone, 3 would be in the same area in this neighbourhood next to each other, whereas another 3 schools will be a kilometer or 2 away, all with 400-800 kids in, probably starving, with my partner at the end of the day telling me how far they have to walk each afternoon, some go as far as 15km, because they can’t afford a taxi ride of just R6.

As the days progressed with me experiencing the poverty, driving through these areas that I was told never to enter, I realised one thing, my whole life I have been living a luxurious life, never have to worry about where I am going to find food or water, or a place to sleep, or thinking will I be safe tonight? I don’t know what that is, I have never experienced it and so I realised that this way of thinking I have, is not acceptable.

The reaction within my mind was kind of weird, it was like an image within my mind that clashed with reality as I saw it, telling me this is not real, this should not be real, wtf are we doing to our fellow human beings? No one deserves to live a life like this where they can barely survive.  

Change is needed.

 Get a move on, for more info on memories and thoughts, visit: http://lite.desteniiprocess.com