Is my mind stuck in a loop? Every day, even
on a day off, I am asking myself why can’t I get a day off from work, to just
sit at home and chill, but then I realise I am doing it at the moment. That’s
the reason for me to be able to ask this question in the first place, because
when I am busy I don’t have time to think about this.
I would find that I feel that I have worked
hard during the week, and deserve this a day off from work, not needing to go
and do my responsible thing as I have to do every day to earn money to be able
to survive. Yes, survive.
This was the problem I faced for a year and
few months, always wanted that day off and never seemed to get it, even if I
had a long weekend, or a 3 weeks holiday. It is as if I am tired the whole
time, and then my mind gets stuck in this loop, where it thinks I still need a
holiday to rest while, well, resting.
My mind would create any justifications
needed to support this idea, where I would use it against myself and I would
believe it. That is how one abuses self with lies and justification. You would
justify the concept of “getting a day off” through telling yourself you have worked
enough this week and needs rest or time to explore the outside world, or you
need a little bit of “me” time, or you just need to get out of the money system
to be free etc. and this list goes on as you are in the moment of thought,
limiting yourself.
The thing is, this is just laziness that
acts out, because when I do have the day off, I am not exploring the world, I
am not taking the time for myself, and best off all I am not doing anything
about the fact that I am trapped within this money system. This is all lies I
tell myself just to spend my time in front of the computer or any other “useless”
activity, which isn’t “me” time because I am not spending it with me.
The problem here is, I am limited by
thoughts, meaning one should not use the mind, but instead take on the
challenge of self-responsibility, and with self-direction to direct yourself to
do what is necessary in the physical reality of now, and of course within the moment
of each breath. Meaning if you take that
day off, you’re not going to spend it playing games, but actually use the time
to improve yourself with the “me time” concept, or take on the challenge to get
yourself out of the money system (or just accept it, learn how it works exactly
and make it better for yourself) and help others in this process.
Through doing this, I’ll already break the
loop which my mind is set in, when I feel tired of working.
Next post, applying SF for not taking
self-responsible, Self-direction, and the justifications.
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